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Blackbooks

Discussion in 'Toys forum' started by Kayone707, Jun 15, 2005.

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  1. aefx-one

    aefx-one Member

    • Messages: 15
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  2. AnteUp

    AnteUp Elite Member

    • Messages: 1,480
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    wat do u mean? its a forcefield kneegrow...u can have two diff. colors on a force field?:confused:
     
  3. -ShAmEE-

    -ShAmEE- Elite Member

    • Messages: 1,239
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    ai166.photobucket.com_albums_u86_ShAm33_sweet12thone.jpg

    soo far...this will look good. i hope. just takin ma time.
     
  4. bouncingsoul

    bouncingsoul Elite Member

    • Messages: 1,242
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  5. The_Sheep

    The_Sheep Senior Member

    • Messages: 58
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    Alright time for some more crits for everyone

    Glas- Nice and simple, i like all the letters except for the G, can't really tell its a G, L could be confusing maybe not, love the A and the S, add some drop shadow

    Afek- the 3d is on point, just work on getting it cleaner, the letters are somewhat dull but the structure is good, i would just say start cleaning your stuff up, like do a trace over with nice clean straight lines

    Hungr- I would say incorporating the bar lines from your sketch into the actual piece is a pretty bad idea, it doesn't really flow and it just looks awkward, the letters are nice and simple, but the crayons im not feeling, and yes pink is very cute, also try to map out your pieces before you sketch them, unless you meant to have Hun and gr separate. The second piece is fire, the G and R are out of proportion to the piece though, and the R needs some work, get rid of the little penis sticking out of the rounded part

    emokid- the letter style and flow is nice man, but blend the cross bar on the A, and the R looks like a K, very nice though

    Alive- idk, i really don't like this whole extremely messy style thing you got going on, it just doesn't look good, and i don't see why you freestyle with markers...but the letters is nice, maybe do a trace over and then post it, can barely make out the structure when you post the marker freestyle

    Soner- The Amkah piace, lots of unnecesary looking add ons and stuff, also the K just looks extremely off i think its that little middle penis thing on the main bar, and your bubbles need more randomness, vary the sizes more, but i really like the "gentle" look of that piece. The Wienot piece, the top one is fresh, i would say add something to the I, it looks out of place and too plain. The bottom one though is not too good, the faces look bad, and the letters are kind of ugly, and the dropshadow on the T is way off, work on your handy as well. The next piece, get rid of that cigarette looking thing sticking out of the S it looks retarded, the O looks nothing like an O, theres some weird shit goin on with the N but it looks nice, the E is nice, except for that thing sticking out the top, at least blend it man. Next, the top one, the S is nice, the O looks dumb with the blackness, the N is nice, the E looks out of place, and again the blackness looks dumb. The Second, the S is nice, the O again has horrible letter structure, study how bars intersect and all that and youll see the flaws in your Os, the N is nice but again BLEND, that E im definitely feeling, nice 3d as well, prob the best piece of all you posted.

    Tazm- nice simple, cool colors, my only complaint is the 3D is off, try doing some more difficult stuff now, it looks like your ready

    Meeter Maid- let me first say that your sig literally makes me sick, i wish you would change it cause its not even funny, just gross. Anyway, top left, bleh, too out there for my taste its like trying to make the two extremes work together, im sorry but huge fat bars with tiny little skinny bitch bars together looks dumb. Top right, M needs alot of work, the E needs shortening in the middle bar department, and the pink E looks weird as hell, if your gonna try and pull one of those don't pull it on a letter thats repeated, thought that would be obvious, the T is stylish and nice. The bottom left, the top piece looks good i guess, reminds me of squidward from spongebob though with all those things sticking out of the letters, i dont like the face. The bottom one, not gonna crit cause i cant even begin to read it. THe last one, like what your trying to do eith the fill but you should come up with some nice letters first at least, looks lazy. All in all i would say go back to simples or simpler shit, your sttempting to do all this stuff but you dont have the basics down yet.

    Bouncing- can't see much but from the looks of it it looks nice, cant wait for the darkened piece

    Mast- cant read it, but looks like you got some original ass shit going on keep it up

    Nem- first one, work on spacing your letters, and cmon i know you can come up with a better fill than that. The second one, looks good, but the drop shadow looks more like an outline? The last one, really like it man, the skulls or whatever look cool with the pink, although i don't think skulls are shiny, unless you polished them i guess, anyway yeah my favorite.

    Breakout Azer- Downsize the A, Beef up the S and fix the E, drop the stars as well, looks kind of fruity in my opinion

    Mr Maze- looks awkward for some reason, i like the darker one better, work on making your letters flow and compliment eachother

    Tazm again- very nice man, dont really have much to say except for that

    Mr Tasty- i think if your gonna post a sketch like that at least post a bigger pic, hard to see anything

    Eske one- the handy says Ples, but the piece looks like PLBS, i would beef up the P, and fix that letter, looks nothing like in the english language man...

    Cali- indeed it is sloppy, the L is way off, i would say try simples man

    Shamee- not sure why your doing simples now but work on straightness and steadiness

    Bouncing again- no offense but it seems like this piece is a lost cause doesnt seem like its gonna end up to be much, i would ditch it, you will probably prove me wrong though

    Aefx- Nice letters, fix the X though, looks a bit overdone

    Shamee again- simples is loookin nice man

    Aefx again- the 3d is way off, also the F has horrid structure, study simples and youll see why, and for some reason the X looks underdone now

    Shamee once again- not sure what it is but it looks like fuckin fire

    Bouncing once again- WOW, probably about as clean of a freestyle as Ive ever seen, simply beautiful, i cant even begin to decipher how you get letters to flow so well so ill just appreciate it man, fuckin DOPE, i wish you would do full pieces though

    Wow that was fucking long, hopefully ill have my camera back soon and i can post some of my own shit, prob be back for another crit sess on Monday, see you all then peace
     
    Last edited: Jun 23, 2007
  6. rayseone

    rayseone Senior Member

    • Messages: 388
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    shit son we need more people on these forums like you, good work.

    bouncing im really feeling the sek but not the a so much maybe you shoulda made a straight bar

    shame the s looks good but id say redo the W it juts seems awkward

    aefx dont connect your letters,
     
  7. sank.

    sank. Senior Member

    • Messages: 191
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    wow bs has changed alot. i see knews is still bringin that fire with those pen sketches.

    anywho heres some shit simples done by yours truly.

    ai106.photobucket.com_albums_m258_si0n_IMG_0691.jpg
     
  8. spag

    spag Senior Member

    • Messages: 308
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  9. MAST

    MAST Elite Member

    • Messages: 1,472
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    original of what i posted before
    ai5.photobucket.com_albums_y165_seventh672_OMNI.jpg

    putting together a simple
    ai5.photobucket.com_albums_y165_seventh672_OMNI3.jpg

    simple finished
    ai5.photobucket.com_albums_y165_seventh672_OMNI2.jpg


    got a new charac from it too
     
  10. Synaesthesia

    Synaesthesia Senior Member

    • Messages: 95
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    spag- i think the letters are good, but i dont like the add on at the top of the C. Maybe smooth that out a bit and it will be sweet.
     
  11. BIGel

    BIGel Elite Member

    • Messages: 2,073
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    the idea's pretty tight but the execution is weak.

    bouncin you ever tried coloring those sketches?

    afc03.deviantart.com_fs16_i_2007_174_f_4_taum_by_bigel.jpg

    apic20.picturetrail.com_VOL1202_4129875_15355407_261589247.jpg
     
    Last edited: Jun 24, 2007
  12. Degausserr x

    Degausserr x Senior Member

    • Messages: 326
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  13. kelio

    kelio Senior Member

    • Messages: 130
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    BIGel: i dont think you belong in the toy forums. lol. i love all of your stuff though.

    MAST: keep it simple.

    spag: keep working on it. i like the c

    sank: i dont like the addons on the a and k but nice simple besides that.

    amk: fuck thats nice.


    kinda messed up. but this is my throw so far. and some characters.
    ai181.photobucket.com_albums_x108_hoop_blah_a22c4b42.jpg
     
  14. Edward"Sezer"Hands

    Edward"Sezer"Hands Elite Member

    • Messages: 1,297
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    bigel- love the style always have very distinct .
    mast- im glad you took my advice to go simpler but go simpler than that.
    spag- not really feeling that throw.
    sank- ive watched you progress so much you actually have taken peoples advice and used it. your letters flow very well but the top of the n on the right side is a bit akward same with the top of the s. Keep it up.
    shamee- not really feeling the w.
    aefx-one- go simpler gave an example a page back or so.
    ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    *asek battle*
    ai41.photobucket.com_albums_e276_DannyHartu_Picture222.jpg
    steze
    ai41.photobucket.com_albums_e276_DannyHartu_Picture223.jpg
    some rattatouile inspired sketches.
    ai41.photobucket.com_albums_e276_DannyHartu_Picture224.jpg
    ai41.photobucket.com_albums_e276_DannyHartu_Picture225.jpg
     
  15. WolfBurrns

    WolfBurrns Senior Member

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    You should make your K's like your S. Just an idea.
     
  16. Bazer

    Bazer Moderator

    • Messages: 5,139
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    bullshit. that wasn't chitchat those were crits...

    ai190.photobucket.com_albums_z227_bazer6_ebook_SP_A0897.jpg
     
  17. WolfBurrns

    WolfBurrns Senior Member

    • Messages: 321
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    ai54.photobucket.com_albums_g86_wolfburrns_fuckers.jpg

    Yeah that was gay. But anyway, I meant the bottom part of the K.


    fuckers...... :D
     
  18. C3ZR ONE

    C3ZR ONE Moderator

    • Messages: 3,112
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    Sezer- I like your handyrock alot. You've got a fantastic hold on flow.

    El- I can't even crit you properly holmes.. I can only be inspired. I'm rocking a big piece tommorow downtown on a legal wall. I'll get a flick. You can see I've been inspired by your work.

    Bouncing- I like your letters and your natural flow has really progressed alot since you started.

    Shammee- I really like where you're going with that. You're progressing nicely. I can't read it, but I like it anyway. haha

    Sank- You've got a solid foundation to build off of. Now it's time to start building, cuzz I'm not seeing alot of progression. Your use of bar method is on point. I'd continue to really dig in and focus on the natural flow of the letters. It looks a little forced and uptight. Loosey goosey baby... Loosey goosey. haha.

    Degassuer X- Give crits= get crits. The new mods are doing a great job of pushing that. Props to them.

    Keelio- I dunno really. I guess it looks fun, but I think beginners are alot better off starting on a solid letter foundation than a throwie style. Learn flow first to really down a throwie. I think throwies are very difficult to do well personally. Keep at it tho.

    Mast- 1st pic= not even feeling it. Looks like a roller that went wrong. 2nd pic has alot of potential, but lost out on it in the final pic. It's origional tho. Respect for that.

    Spag- Same crit as Keelio only I really stress it more for you. It's shakey and has no flow. An emulation of something you just aren't ready for. Get a foundation and build of that.

    aefx- You need to go back to blocks. You're all over the place. It's really begginner shit, but we all start somewhere. Have you looked thru the new2graff thread? That's where you need to be.
     
  19. BIGel

    BIGel Elite Member

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    bump for new flix. :)

    edit-thanks cezr good luck with the wall send me some flix i wanna see how the graff king of the great north is rollin!
     
  20. C3ZR ONE

    C3ZR ONE Moderator

    • Messages: 3,112
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    Oops.. Baze- lovin that new style.


    Sezer- I highly reccomend not deleting another mods posts. Good keeping up, but it's just bad form bee.