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Suicide

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Msfyt, May 7, 2007.

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  1. DeDo1

    DeDo1 Senior Member

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    i know what you mean i get bullied and shit and i dont know what to do so i go to sleep till class ends.
    sometimes i just want to rip there heads off and use it as a paper weight or a soccer ball either way it entertaining
     
  2. Siner

    Siner Senior Member

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    Fuck, I don't really get bullied in school. I usually just like daydream about killin' myself, like pullin' a gun out and just shootin' myself while sittin' in my desk in the middle of class. I can just imagine everyone panicin' while they hear the gun go off and me hit the desk and blood everywhere. I guess I probally shouldn't be daydreamin' about all this shit, but thats what it's come down to unfortanetly.
     
  3. EgoZen

    EgoZen Elite Member

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    School isn`t really that depressing but the reactions of parent if you get a bad grade..
    Of course school is much stress but it`s for your own good..:

    I`m in the 4th grade of grammar school...
    And I`m so happy that this is my last year before I go to college...

    And well I hate it too...

    I guess it`s my time now to speak up about suicide..:

    I wanted to kill myself couple of times, but I didn`t have the guts...
    My last time was less than a month ago...
    I wanted it to look like an accident ...
    *Cutting bred and whoop there goes the knife over the wrist...*
    Well the knife wasn`t sharp enough... so fuck it...

    Guys, if any of you wants to kill yourself ...
    Wait at least 2 weeks and if you still want to kill yourself then...
    It`s your choice...
    But just wait it will get better sooner or later ;)
     
  4. xDesTx

    xDesTx Senior Member

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    Here we go again guys,

    Well lately, three people i cared about passed away, one was my grandma which i was close to died recently and I've had a hard time coping with it, then my friends uncle died and it effected me because i used to hang around with him when i was younger, i never knew he had cancer which kind of stuffed me up lately, this has been pushing me further over the edge and I've been contemplating suicide, i looked up top 10 ways to commit suicide and the methods (easy to figure but they came as a package) and i planned on doing it this week (well rather today) but last night it slipped out when i was talking to my best friend, and she burst out crying, then at that moment i seen one true emotion towards me, my family couldn't care less what i do, the only real people who did, well did was my brother's, one of them passed away when i was 7 and the other i don't talk to now, but in the last week i found out that her other uncle committed suicide, that pushed me over the edge because i knew him well because i was always at her house when he was there, well today i was planning on shooting myself in the head because i have quick access to firearms (Gun Closet in the house) but when i started talking about if I'm going to do it to my friend yesterday i seen how much it effected her, and i just cried with her, i spent 4 hours trying to calm her down while explaining why i was going to do it, then she settled and said that she cant stop me, so shes not going to try to, and she told me she will never forget me and how i helped her (I'm like her guardian angel supposedly) but seeing her cry made me think twice and at the moment i don't want to put her through that pain, but i do want to commit suicide, I'm so confused.

    Someone help a poor soul out

    - Sick In Love
     
  5. Siner

    Siner Senior Member

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    I feel like I'm in no position to help you cause of all my fucked up problems, but I'm gonna try anyway. You have a really easy way to kill yourself, I mean havin' access to a gun is really temptin' I understand. But if you can't live for yourself, live for those who care about you. Think how it would affect your family and friends, and think about the fact that you actully have people to support you. Just by stayin' alive your helpin' other people like your best friend out, who might even kill herself if she has to see another person kill thereself. So seek some help, councellin' or whatever, cause theres so much to live for even though it doesn't seem like it now, good luck.
     
  6. Msfyt

    Msfyt Elite Member

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    ok this is going to sound very extreme but here is my advice...

    tell your parents straight up that you have thought about suicide because there are accessable gun(s) in the house, no matter how much you think they dont care

    now if you dont want to open up to your parents i suggest you tell an adult who you trust and is concerned about your safety, so they can apporach your parents

    dont make it easy for yourself to make spilt second life decisions, remove those items from your life (pills, guns, rope, etc)

    but dont feel bad about wanting to know more about death or even killing yourself. you know why, because communication and honest information are usually what is missing in life. the reason people stay sane is because they can have all the horrible thoughts they want, as long as they dont act on those thoughts. but since we cant read others mind, we think we are alone with what ever emotions/situtation has us feeling down.

    anyways im rambling...

    but how can you be so certian things wont get better?



    there is a
     
  7. MessTonic

    MessTonic Senior Member

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    dude dont think about that, school is just a load of bullshit anyways.. You are probably a better person than any of those fake ass bitches that go there.. I hate everyone at school except for my group of friends because everyone else tries to act like someone they arent just to be cool, fuck it.. People at school just fill your mind with a bunch of bullshit.. If you dont have many friends find someone that also doesnt and start talking to them, usually they will be very interesting and are probably also shy so you will have something in common and they will feel happy that you are talking to them..
     
  8. xDesTx

    xDesTx Senior Member

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    MessTonic thats the brightest thing ive seen you say, well i aint seen much of your posts but

    =D Wub For Tonic =D
     
  9. Siner

    Siner Senior Member

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    Thanx for the advice, for me it's just so hard to connect with anyone at school cause I feel so diffrent. But I know there are people with the same problems as me at school, so I have to quit feelin' like that. Thanx again.
     
  10. acereborn

    acereborn Elite Member

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    ^^ yeah, sometimes you'll get lucky and find someone you can really connect to, your usually not the only one that has been through troubles. just always look towards the future, think about the things that you love doing, and try to get out and do them more. just always look on the brighter side of things, because you can find happiness everywhere. whether its hanging out with friends, playing sports, painting, whatever it is, its better than taking your life.

    if anyone on here ever wants to talk to me about anything at all, hit me up on msn or aim

    aim: burgess19
    msn: [email protected]
     
  11. -Leski

    -Leski Senior Member

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    Farther up there, about wanting to commit to suicide...
    -----------------------------------------------------------
    When I was little I got bullied until I had mental scars that still fuck with my head and social life today, I was over weight and a loner,that just happens to be one of the prime kinda people to pick on. Anyways so now I cant go out in public without a retarded subconscious fear of people judging me, hating me for no reason, ext.

    Anyways I start working on that, I lost weight, start eating healthy, exercising, ext, ext and then out of nowhere I go into chemical depression. Hormones or what not caused my brain to stop making serotonin, the drug that makes you feel happy. So I fucking plummeted, I was working so hard to pick myself up but nothing I did made me feel good/happy.

    At first I just gave up on everything, nothing worked so why bother, right? I dropped out of school (a 70-80% student without effort), lost contact with all my friends, and became almost subhuman.
    I just lied in bed with my thoughts. I wouldnt talk to anyone, wouldnt eat, I just wanted everything to go away.

    I would read books, listen to music, anything to stop thinking, my thoughts scared me. It was as though someone else was thinking my thoughts, they were foreign and strange. I would think of my friends and happy memories... then my mind slowly would twist them into horrible things, I realized I had at first misinterpreted these situations. They wernt happy memories at all, I had been living in some fairytale. None of it was happy, ever.

    Depression transforms you and makes a false reality that makes perfect sense.

    Within a month I was suicidal.
    I didnt tell anyone though, because I wanted to keep that last chip in my pocket to throw in when I couldnt handle it anymore.
    I looked for help, I got therapy which didnt help much.

    After another few months of getting close to desperation... I tried to cut myself, I went to the bathroom layed down in the tub and held a packing razor against the inside of my elbow and slowly began to push it in, I've never told anyone in my family this, I was going to do it and at no point did i doubt it.

    But I didnt, I threw it at a wall and then wept like a child.... I decided I couldnt do it to my family, I greedily wanted to die but I couldnt kill myself. I gathered up my knives and other shit and gave it to my mom to hold onto for me.

    More months later a doctor finally realized that it wasnt environmental depression but chemical depression and the therapy wasnt gonna do jack. They started me on drugs and new therapy which did work.

    So here I am, 2 years and change later, just finally having climbed out of the pit.
    I feel fine, I dont handle stress well anymore and have to rebuild my life, but I'm still alive. I'll be off the medication in another few months here. You can get through it if you just hold on and dont take the shortcut along your forearm

    TL;DR version.
    Dont commit suicide, No matter how bad it looks, no matter how bad it feels.
    If you get help, reach out when you dont want to and get someone to help pull you out you'll make it.

    I'm happy I'm alive, I've found a lot of things worth being around for.
    Fuck the rest of the world, do your own thing for yourself and your family.

    Second what Messtonic said.

    [/long ass post]
     
    Last edited: Mar 27, 2008
  12. ...uhh

    ...uhh Senior Member

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    alot of my friends have attempted it...me too....

    its a wierd thing....u try to do it cause u hurt....but then the idea hurts.....so u feel worse about things than u did before.....it keeps going............and then u feel like a bitch who is fucked up for even thinking it in the first place...and noone really knows how mad or sad u are or were yesterday...and u just shut it in...



    some days im like fuck it why the fuck not...i could go get that shit and it would be done in like 4 minutes...noone would give a fuck...it would actually help everyone out............and then other days its like ...i just wanna see what happens next...then maybe ill do it...

    lol i came up in here cause today was one of those....fuck it... days...
     
  13. -Leski

    -Leski Senior Member

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    Feel ya man, I know that one.

    You feel so bad you want it all gone, then you feel worse when you think about suicide as a way to make it all gone. Then you try to push it aside but you always know that you went there and it just ebbs in the back of your mind.

    You just keep going there, a bit closer each time until you actually try to do it.
    Then you pull yourself out of it, or dont...

    Yah man, just hold in there. It will pass, then you gotta try to keep outa that state of mind.

    As helpful as I know that statement is... >_>
     
    Last edited: Mar 27, 2008
  14. ...uhh

    ...uhh Senior Member

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    word i feel ya man

    yeah man just keep urself busy...thats one of the easiest things to do...
     
  15. xylene hug

    xylene hug Elite Member

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    i took the time to read every ones post on here and would like to offer some advice.

    1. no matter what life throws at you there will be i point where it gets better. i promise .maybe not now but in the future. "life can only turn you upside down so many times till your right side up again" i said that. to a friend in need.

    2.take what strangers have to say with a grain of salt.(who really cares what some one you dont know thinks about you) your loved ones opinions are what matters.

    3.love your life. yeah like that atmosphere song!

    4. be strong! hold your head up high in bad situations you can overcome it.

    i hope these words help.
    i know life is hella hard. but to make life easy you have to work for it first.
     
  16. IRL.TMP

    IRL.TMP Member

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    word
    i will be passing through often for a wake up call
     
  17. xDesTx

    xDesTx Senior Member

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    Thanks guys these helped a lot, I've heard from my doctor that i may have severe depressive disorder, which makes my life worse, but thanks guys, you've helped me a lot and you've made me realize there is people that care,

    this is the thread that i visit most, and on other sites I've been on other suicide threads,

    Thanks again,

    - Sick In Love
     
  18. -Leski

    -Leski Senior Member

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    Yah, This thead is great. I never talked to anyone about the deep and gritty shit when I went through depression. I dont want to scare my family about how bad it had actualy been.

    I'm down for helping out anyone I can in here, I've been on the lowest rung, I know whats its like.
     
  19. lolque?

    lolque? Senior Member

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    guys, i need help. my girlfriend just broke up... now its like all the shit in my life arent worth it anymore. school bores me, the music i listen to bores me... graff bores me, even...
     
  20. cds_dogg665544

    cds_dogg665544 Senior Member

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    try listening to asheru hes the shit hes the one that did the boondocks theme song